GOD'S TOTAL QUALITY MANAGEMENT QUESTIONNAIRE
Subject: God has sent a questionnaire to the ANDERE-L religious discussion list
Date: Tue, 5 Mar 96 17:30:47 -0500 (GMT)
Evidently, God has (unless this is someone's idea of a joke) sent a questionnaire to the ANDERE-L religious discussion list. I will repeat it below on the assumption that He does not take copyright on his work.
\s\ Austin Meredith <r2chow@uci.edu, "Stack of the Artist of Kouroo" Project
---------- Forwarded message ----------
GOD'S TOTAL QUALITY MANAGEMENT QUESTIONNAIRE 3/3/95
God would like to thank you for your belief and patronage. In order to better serve your needs, He asks that you take a few moments to answer the following questions. Please keep in mind that your responses will be kept completely confidential, and that you need not disclose your name or address unless you prefer a direct response to comments or suggestions.
1. How did you find out about God?
| __ Newspaper __ Television __ Word of mouth __ Bible __ Torah |
__ Other Book __ Divine Inspirtion __ Near Death Experience __ Other (specify): _____________ |
2. Are you currently using any other source of
inspiration in addition to God?
Please check all that apply.
| __ Tarot __ Horoscope __ Fortune cookies __ Self-help books __ Biorythms __ Mantras __ Insurance policies |
__ Lottery __ Television __ Ann Landers __ Sex __ Alcohol or drugs __ Other: _____________________ __ None |
3. God employs a limited degree of Divine Intervention
to preserve the balanced level of felt presence and
blind faith.
Which would you prefer (circle one)?
a. More Divine Intervention
b. Less Divine Intervention
c. Current level of Divine Intervention is just right
d. Don't know
4. God also attempts to maintain a balanced level
of disasters and miracles.
Please rate on a scale of 1 - 5 his handling of the
following
(1=unsatisfactory, 5=excellent):
- Disasters (flood, famine, earthquake, war)
1 2 3 4 5 - Miracles (rescues, spontaneous remission
of disease, sport upsets)
1 2 3 4 5
5. Do you have any additional comments or suggestions
for improving the quality of God's services?
(Attach an additional sheet if necessary):
Thank you!