Potpourri

Subject: God has sent a questionnaire to the ANDERE-L religious discussion list

Date: Tue, 5 Mar 96 17:30:47 -0500 (GMT)

Evidently, God has (unless this is someone's idea of a joke) sent a questionnaire to the ANDERE-L religious discussion list. I will repeat it below on the assumption that He does not take copyright on his work.

\s\ Austin Meredith <r2chow@uci.edu, "Stack of the Artist of Kouroo" Project

---------- Forwarded message ----------

GOD'S TOTAL QUALITY MANAGEMENT QUESTIONNAIRE 3/3/95

God would like to thank you for your belief and patronage. In order to better serve your needs, He asks that you take a few moments to answer the following questions. Please keep in mind that your responses will be kept completely confidential, and that you need not disclose your name or address unless you prefer a direct response to comments or suggestions.

1. How did you find out about God?

__ Newspaper __ Television __ Word of mouth __ Bible __ Torah

__ Other Book __ Divine Inspiration __ Near Death Experience __ Other     (specify): _____________

2. Are you currently using any other source of inspiration in addition to God?
Please check all that apply.

__ Tarot __ Horoscope __ Fortune cookies __ Self-help books __ Biorythms __ Mantras __ Insurance policies

__ Lottery __ Television __ Ann Landers __ Sex __ Alcohol or drugs __ Other: _____________________ __ None

3. God employs a limited degree of Divine Intervention to preserve the balanced level of felt presence and blind faith.
Which would you prefer (circle one)?

a. More Divine Intervention
b. Less Divine Intervention
c. Current level of Divine Intervention is just right
d. Don't know

4. God also attempts to maintain a balanced level of disasters and miracles.
Please rate on a scale of 1 - 5 his handling of the following
(1=unsatisfactory, 5=excellent):

a. Disasters (flood, famine, earthquake, war)
       1    2    3    4    5

b. Miracles (rescues, spontaneous remission of disease, sport upsets)
       1    2    3    4    5

5. Do you have any additional comments or suggestions for improving the quality of God's services?
(Attach an additional sheet if necessary):

Thank you!